Afgelopen donderdag weer bij Joris geweest en ik moet zeggen dat het bij hem heel afwisselend is. En dan druk ik me nog voorzichtig uit.
Goed, om te beginnen hebben we eerst koffie gedronken, hij vindt dat leuk en gezellig. Ik begrijp dat nu ook, die man zit veel alleen thuis en heeft zodoende behoefte aan wat gezelschap. Dus, na wat praatjes over koetjes en kalfjes hebben we het nog even gehad over mijn werk op de wc. Nu hij een keer is mee geweest wil hij weten of er nog iets leuks was gebeurd. Zo vroeg hij dat ook: ‘En hoe was het op je andere werk, is er nog iets bijzonders gebeurd?’ Ik moest even goed nadenken, maar er was inderdaad iets wat ik wel grappig vond om hem dat te vertellen.
‘Nou,’ begon ik, ‘er is inderdaad iets gebeurd. Het was gisteren zo rond een uur of 8 toen er een man naar binnen kwam. Hij liep net zoals iedereen dat doet naar de wc.’Joris zat aandachtig te luisteren, ik zag het aan zijn gezicht. Hij genoot echt, leuk is dat. Maar goed, ik dus verder vertellen.
‘Die man kwam nadat hij van de wc afkwam naar me toe en zei: “Mag ik u iets vragen?”
Ik knikte, nou en toen kwam het. Hij wilde weten of het normaal is als je bloed in je poep hebt. Ik schrok en schudde mijn hoofd. Nee, zei ik, dat is niet goed, ik denk dat u het beste naar de dokter kan gaan. Hij schudde zijn hoofd en zei dat hij dat niet durfde. Kan het niet zo zijn dat het vanzelf over gaat?
Ik dacht even na en vroeg of hij zeker wist dat het bloed was. Misschien heeft u zich bezeerd op het toilet, vroeg ik. Zou kunnen toch? Joris knikte en ging er goed voor zitten. Ik lachte en vertelde verder. Hij zei dat hij zijn bibs – zo noemde hij dat!- altijd afveegt met een nagelborsteltje!
‘Dat meen je niet!’ reageerde Joris geschrokken.
‘Dat dacht ik dus ook,’ zei ik.
‘Maar wat heb je gezegd?’
‘Nou,’ ging ik verder,’ik heb hem heel voorzichtig verteld dat hij dat niet meer moet doen. Ik zei; “U moet dat niet meer met een nagelborsteltje doen, maar met toiletpapier.”
‘En,’ zei Joris, ‘wat zei hij?’
Ik lachte en schudde mijn hoofd. ‘Hij zei dat hij dat vies vond. “Dan blijft er allemaal poep aan mijn vinger zitten!” Joris schaterde het uit! ‘Wat zei jij toen?’
‘Ik heb niks gezegd, helemaal niks. Er viel me ook niks meer in.’
‘Dat geloof ik graag,’ Joris staarde voor zich uit. ‘het is niet te geloven, maar wel grappig.’
Ik knikte en keek naar de klok: ‘ Maar nu ga ik aan het werk, anders komt het niet af.’
Joris lachte: ‘Dat was écht een leuk verhaal, ik verheug me al op de volgende keer.’
‘Zal het onthouden,’ antwoordde ik lachend terug en liep naar de keuken om mijn spullen te pakken.
Nu ik al een paar keer bij hem gepoetst heb gaat het me goed af. Het is ook prettig omdat ik rustig mijn gang kan gaan. Maar…toen ik klaar was kwam hij op het idee om eitjes te gaan bakken voor ons twee. Ik heb hem gezegd dat ik het heel lief vond, maar naar huis moest omdat ik weinig tijd had. Hij vond het jammer, maar begreep het wel.
Ik heb hem wel beloofd dat we binnenkort weer eens ergens naar toe gaan. En hij mag zelf iets bedenken. Dat leek hem wel wat.
Volgende keer zou margriet kunnen vragen”heeft u gisteravond biertjes gegeten”
Hoe kom je erop…..je bibs…..afvegen met een nagelborstel.
Lachen, gieren, brullen. Er gebeuren ook wel gekke dingen bij de toilet!!!
I don’t think the title of your article matches the content lol. Just kidding, mainly because I had some doubts after reading the article.
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Understanding COSC Validation and Its Importance in Horology
COSC Certification and its Demanding Standards
COSC, or the Official Swiss Chronometer Testing Agency, is the official Swiss testing agency that verifies the precision and precision of wristwatches. COSC certification is a symbol of superior craftsmanship and reliability in timekeeping. Not all watch brands follow COSC accreditation, such as Hublot, which instead follows to its own strict standards with movements like the UNICO, achieving similar precision.
The Science of Precision Timekeeping
The core mechanism of a mechanized timepiece involves the spring, which supplies energy as it unwinds. This mechanism, however, can be susceptible to external factors that may impact its precision. COSC-accredited mechanisms undergo strict testing—over 15 days in various conditions (5 positions, three temperatures)—to ensure their resilience and reliability. The tests evaluate:
Typical daily rate precision between -4 and +6 secs.
Mean variation, peak variation rates, and impacts of temperature changes.
Why COSC Certification Matters
For watch enthusiasts and collectors, a COSC-validated watch isn’t just a item of tech but a demonstration to lasting excellence and accuracy. It signifies a watch that:
Provides exceptional reliability and precision.
Provides assurance of quality across the entire construction of the watch.
Is apt to maintain its value more efficiently, making it a wise choice.
Famous Chronometer Brands
Several well-known manufacturers prioritize COSC accreditation for their watches, including Rolex, Omega, Breitling, and Longines, among others. Longines, for instance, provides collections like the Archive and Spirit, which highlight COSC-validated mechanisms equipped with cutting-edge substances like silicone equilibrium suspensions to enhance resilience and efficiency.
Historical Context and the Evolution of Timepieces
The notion of the timepiece dates back to the requirement for exact chronometry for navigation at sea, highlighted by John Harrison’s work in the eighteenth century. Since the formal foundation of Controle Officiel Suisse des Chronometres in 1973, the accreditation has become a benchmark for judging the precision of high-end timepieces, maintaining a legacy of excellence in watchmaking.
Conclusion
Owning a COSC-accredited watch is more than an visual choice; it’s a commitment to excellence and precision. For those valuing precision above all, the COSC certification offers peace of mind, ensuring that each certified timepiece will perform dependably under various circumstances. Whether for personal satisfaction or as an investment, COSC-accredited watches distinguish themselves in the world of horology, carrying on a tradition of precise chronometry.
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Understanding COSC Accreditation and Its Importance in Horology
COSC Accreditation and its Demanding Criteria
Controle Officiel Suisse des Chronometres, or the Official Swiss Chronometer Testing Agency, is the authorized Swiss testing agency that attests to the accuracy and precision of timepieces. COSC validation is a sign of quality craftsmanship and trustworthiness in timekeeping. Not all timepiece brands pursue COSC certification, such as Hublot, which instead follows to its own strict standards with mechanisms like the UNICO calibre, reaching similar precision.
The Science of Precision Chronometry
The core system of a mechanized watch involves the spring, which delivers power as it unwinds. This mechanism, however, can be prone to environmental elements that may influence its precision. COSC-validated movements undergo strict testing—over 15 days in various circumstances (5 positions, three temperatures)—to ensure their durability and dependability. The tests evaluate:
Mean daily rate precision between -4 and +6 secs.
Mean variation, peak variation levels, and impacts of thermal variations.
Why COSC Validation Matters
For timepiece fans and connoisseurs, a COSC-validated timepiece isn’t just a piece of tech but a proof to lasting excellence and precision. It symbolizes a watch that:
Provides excellent reliability and accuracy.
Provides confidence of superiority across the complete construction of the watch.
Is likely to retain its value more effectively, making it a smart choice.
Famous Timepiece Manufacturers
Several renowned brands prioritize COSC certification for their timepieces, including Rolex, Omega, Breitling, and Longines, among others. Longines, for instance, presents collections like the Record and Spirit, which highlight COSC-validated movements equipped with cutting-edge materials like silicone equilibrium springs to improve durability and performance.
Historic Background and the Development of Timepieces
The concept of the timepiece dates back to the need for accurate chronometry for navigation at sea, emphasized by John Harrison’s work in the 18th cent. Since the formal foundation of COSC in 1973, the certification has become a standard for evaluating the precision of luxury timepieces, continuing a legacy of superiority in horology.
Conclusion
Owning a COSC-validated timepiece is more than an aesthetic selection; it’s a commitment to quality and precision. For those appreciating accuracy above all, the COSC validation offers peace of mind, ensuring that each validated watch will operate dependably under various circumstances. Whether for personal contentment or as an investment decision, COSC-accredited timepieces stand out in the world of horology, bearing on a legacy of precise chronometry.