Zaterdag 29 Augustus.

Volgens mij heeft Wim het licht gezien, anders kan ik het niet verklaren. Maar goed… hij heeft net zolang gezeurd dat ik heb toegezegd wat die midweek betreft. Ik dacht dan ben ik van het gezeur af, maar nu zit ik er  wel aan vast. We gaan rond half september  naar Yrseke in Zeeland van maandag tot en met vrijdagochtend. Hij heeft het zo gepland dat ik dan op tijd thuis ben om ’s middags naar mijn werk te gaan. Het liefst had hij gezien dat ik vrij had genomen, maar dat wil ik niet. Gisteravond vroeg hij het weer. Ik was net thuis en wilde eigenlijk naar bed, maar hij zat weer op me te wachten, dat doet hij dus ook nog steeds. Hij schonk me een glas wijn in en vroeg of ik nog met mijn baas gesproken had. Ik wist meteen wat hij bedoelde, maar ging er niet op in. Ik schudde enkel mijn hoofd en ging op de bank zitten. Hij was niet blij, dat zag ik aan zijn gezicht, maar hij zei en vroeg niks meer.

Tenminste niet daar over, wel wilde hij weten of ik nog iets bijzonders wilde gaan als we daar zijn. Ik zei dat ik wil uitrusten, maar dat sloeg niet in. Hij schudde geërgerd zijn hoofd: ‘Dat kan je ook thuis doen, mij lijkt het leuk om wandelingen te maken en hier en daar wat te gaan bekijken, Yrseke is een leuk plaatsje, daar is genoeg te zien.

Ik knikte en mompelde iets van: ‘We zien wel wat we doen als we daar zijn, we zijn ook afhankelijk van het weer, als het regent zijn we zo uitgewandeld.’ Verder heb ik niks meer gezegd. Ik heb daar echt geen zin in, hoe langer ik er over nadenk hoe meer ik er tegenop zie.

Trouwens, dat is ook zoiets wazigs: Wim en wandelen!!!

En daar komt ook nog eens bij dat Ruud daar totaal niet moeilijk over doet. Nee, hij vindt het prachtig voor me. Afgelopen donderdag was ik nog bij hem, het was leuk en hij is hartstikke lief, maar dat is het ook. In stilte hoop ik nog steeds dat hij meer wilt, maar ik weet dat dat niet zo is. Maar ik blijf hopen, misschien dat hij toch nog van gedachten veranderd en ook gek op mij wordt. Dat zou fantastisch zijn, ik zie het al gebeuren. Ruud en ik samen in een huis, daar droom ik van.

 

Gisteren maakte ik weer eens iets geks mee op mijn werk. Zo rond een uur of acht kwam er een vrouw naar binnen. Ze lachte vriendelijk en zei: ‘Mag ik u iets vragen?’

Ik knikte en ging recht zitten, want ik weet nu wel dat er dan meestal wel iets geks komt.

Nou, dat was het ook. Ze knikte blij en liep naar mijn tafeltje. ‘Het is zo,’ begon ze, ‘een goede kennis van mij heeft me gevraagd om lid te worden van een breiclubje. Dat schijnt helemaal in te zijn op dit moment.  Zij zegt dat het erg leuk is en ook heel gezellig. Ze breien allemaal iets anders en helpen elkaar ook. Er is een vrouw bij die alles weet en heel goed is en ze kunnen nog mensen gebruiken, nieuwe leden zei ze.’

Ik knikte maar wat en dacht aan die vrouw die hier ook eens een met en breiwerkje gezeten had, ook aan mezelf, maar ik zei niks.

Dat hoefde ook niet want ze ging vrolijk verder. ‘Nu is het zo, ik wil wel lid wil worden, maar niet van een breiclubje.’ Ik keek haar verbaasd aan en vroeg: ‘Hoezo niet, dat is toch leuk.’

Ze knikte blij: ‘Ja, maar ik kan niet breien en dat durf ik niet te zeggen. Nu zoek ik iemand die mij dat wilt leren. Weet u iemand die dat kan? Ik wil er best voor betalen.’

Even kwam ik in de verleiding om haar te helpen, maar dat leek me geen goed idee. Op mijn werk gaat niet en thuis wil ik dat mens niet hebben, dus zei ik:  ‘U moet zeggen dat u niet kan breien, maar het graag wilt leren.’

Ze keek heel bedenkelijk: ‘Ik weet niet, misschien is dat wel een goed idee. Zo ben ik ook aan mijn man blijven hangen, toen ik lid werd van een naaiclubje, daar was hij ook lid van.

Nou, een ding is zeker, hij kan het nog  steeds niet goed. Als ik hem een punt zou moeten geven kwam ik uit op een onvoldoende.’ Ze lachte ondeugend: ‘Maar breien is iets anders dan naaien. Ik denk er nog eens over, in elk geval bedankt. Goedenavond.’

 

Een beetje wazig mens was het wel, maar best grappig. Misschien kan ik er wel wat mee voor als ik weer naar Ruud wil en Wim vragen gaat stellen. Dan zeg ik dat ik naar de naaiclub ga!!!

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