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Zo gaat dat met veel meer dingen, de crèche, de kleuterschool en de basisschool, daar brengen ze je naar toe, maar moeten er wel voor zorgen dat je op tijd bent. Tijd is belangrijk in een mensenleven. In feite moet je alles op tijd doen, eten bijvoorbeeld. Er zijn mensen die zich daar de tijd niet voor gunnen en haastig hun bord leegeten, er zijn ook mensen die er een feestje van maken en het heel uitgebreid doen, net zoals slapen, de een gaat op tijd naar bed, de ander niet.
Werken moeten we allemaal, nou ja, bijna allemaal. Als je een baan hebt van 9 tot 5 moet je die tijd gebruiken om je werk te doen en niet verlummelen met lanterfanten. Doe je dat toch loop je het risico dat je op straat komt te staan, dan heb je één voordeel, en dat is dat je tijd genoeg hebt om “leuke dingen” te doen. Daar kan je veel tijd in kwijt.
Leuke dingen kan van alles zijn, sport, tv kijken, lezen, en nog veel meer. Hoe meer tijd je hebt, hoe meer je daarmee kan doen. Niks doen kan ook, gewoon wachten tot de tijd omgaat. Ik heb vroeger een vrouw gekend die heel vroeg opstond om haar huishouden op orde te brengen zodat ze de rest van de dag tijd had om naar buiten te kijken. Zo krijg je inderdaad ook de tijd om.
Mensen die heel weinig tijd hebben denken dan al gauw: Ik zou willen dat ik daar tijd voor had. Maar als ze die dan zouden hebben zouden ze iets anders gaan doen. Hun tijd nuttig besteden, in elk geval niet niks doen. Toch kan dat ook heel fijn zijn, zeker als je moe bent, dan ga je op de bank hangen, zet de tv aan en doet niks, behalve stompzinnig naar het beeldscherm staren. Maar er zijn mensen die dat weer zonde van de tijd vinden en liever iets nuttigs doen. Die zitten nooit stil, want, zo redeneren ze dan: er is altijd wel iets te doen, ja klopt helemaal.
In mijn jeugd was niets doen not done, dat kon en mocht niet. Ik moest mijn tijd nuttig besteden: helpen in het huishouden, boodschappen doen, dat soort dingen. Dus zorgde ik ervoor dat ik de vrije tijd die ik over had buitenshuis doorbracht.
Dat doen ook veel mensen, zodra ze iets moeten doen waar ze geen zin in hebben, hebben ze geen tijd. Tijd voor andere dingen hebben ze dan wel.
In een relatie gaat het vaak zo, moeders wil iets gedaan hebben, maar vader heeft daar geen zin in, dus zegt hij dat hij daar geen tijd voor heeft. Als moeders nu een beurt wil hebben heeft vader ineens wel tijd, tijd in overvloed! Vrouwen zijn net zo, het is menseneigen. Zodra je iets moet doen waar je geen zin in hebt ben je snel geneigd om te zeggen dat je er geen tijd voor hebt. Maar soms kom je niet weg met dat smoesje. Onverwacht komt iemand naar je toe en vraagt of je ff tijd hebt. “Ik wil je iets vragen, het duurt niet lang, maar heel even.” Dan hang je, zeker als je geen zin hebt om andermans ellende aan te horen. Maar je luistert, geeft advies, toont medeleven en denkt intussen, hier heb ik geen zin in en geen tijd voor! Komt op hetzelfde neer, tenzij het iets is dat je interessant vindt, dan heb je wel tijd. Tijd zat!
Ik verkeer in de luxe positie dat ik in principe tijd genoeg heb, dat heeft voordelen en ook nadelen. Als ik iets moet doen wat ik niet leuk vind, kan ik niet met het smoesje dat ik daar geen tijd voor heb aankomen. Dus moet ik iets anders bedenken, maar ook daar heb ik inmiddels al iets op gevonden. Ik zeg dan dat ik dat niet kan of niet weet hoe het moet, werkt prima!
Ten slotte nog een tip voor mannen: Neem de tijd om naar je naar je vrouw te luisteren!
Is héél belangrijk en goed voor je relatie!
MARIAN.
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