Maandag 20 Juli.

Ik zit er nog steeds mee dat Wim zoveel geld in zijn broekzak had zitten, en dat verhaal over mijn zogenaamde verjaardagscadeau. Hoe langer ik erover nadenk hoe zeker ik er van ben dat hij toch weer gaat gokken. Om stoom af te blazen ga ik zoveel weg en dat helpt. Soms ga ik in mijn uppie wandelen of op een terrasje zitten.

Zo ook afgelopen donderdagmiddag. Ik zat net toen mijn telefoon ging, eerst wilde ik niet opnemen omdat ik dacht dat het Wim was, maar het was Wim niet, het was Ruud!

‘Stoor ik, ’ begon hij. Ik zei: ‘Nee, natuurlijk niet, ik zit op een terrasje te genieten van een kop koffie, moet jij ook doen, is echt aan te bevelen. Trouwens ik heb jou nog gebeld, maar je nam niet op.’ Hij lachte en zei dat hij moest werken en vroeg of ik zin en tijd had om die avond voor hem te koken!  Nou en of ik zin had. Het was bijna te mooi om waar te zijn, maar ik wilde ook niet te enthousiast reageren, dus zei ik zo neutraal mogelijk: ‘Ik denk dat dat wel gaat lukken, ik heb nog niks op het programma staan.’

‘Mooi, ’ regeerde hij blij, ‘je mag zelf bepalen wat we eten, maak maar wat lekkers klaar en vergeet niet de kassabon te bewaren zodat ik je kan terug betalen. Ik ben rond een uur of zes thuis, zie je straks.’

Nou, ik bestelde nog een kop koffie en ben gaan zitten nadenken, over wat ik maken zou en zo. Maar op de een of andere manier lukte dat niet goed, ik weet ook waarom, ik wilde lekker eten op tafel zetten én er leuk uitzien!

Dus ben ik eerst naar de supermarkt gegaan en heb daar uitgebreid rond gekeken. Even kwam in de verleiding om iets met pasta te maken, maar dat eet hij gegarandeerd vaak genoeg.  Uiteindelijk heb ik lamskoteletjes gekocht en een bloemkool. Niet erg origineel, maar ik wilde

iets op tafel zetten dat gezond is en voedzaam.

Nadat ik de boodschappen gedaan had ben ik naar huis gegaan om me om te kleden. Ik wilde er leuk uitzien, want dat was wel belangrijk! Wim was niet thuis, waar hij was kon ik wel raden, maar goed, ik heb een briefje voor hem achtergelaten met de mededeling dat ik onverwachts werken moest. Daarna ben ik naar het huis van Ruud gereden en heb me in alle rust voorbeid.

Even voor half zes had ik alles klaar, de tafel leuk gedekt én een fles wijn klaar gezet. Toen hij binnenkwam begroette hij me vriendelijk en ging aan tafel zitten. De lamskoteletten vielen erg in de smaak, dat zag ik. Goed, ik had die fles wijn op tafel gezet en vroeg of hij een glaasje meedronk. En dat deed hij gelukkig. Na het tweede glas begon hij ineens vragen te stellen. Hoe het ging met mij en of ik nog blij was met mijn werk op de wc. Ik wachtte even met antwoord geven omdat ik ineens weer aan Wim moest denken. Schijnbaar zag hij aan mijn gezicht dat er iets was. ‘Is er iets niet goed of zo?’

Ik nam een grote slok wijn en zei: ‘Och, wat problemen thuis met mijn man.’

Hij keek me aan en zei: ‘Dat is niet best, maar overal is weleens wat, het komt vast goed.’

Ik weet nog niet hoe het kwam, maar ineens begon ik te huilen. Hij schrok en vroeg wat er was. Nou toen heb ik hem alles verteld, over dat gokken, het geld en zijn werk. Al die tijd zei hij niks, pas toen ik zweeg pakte hij mijn hand vast. ‘Ik denk inderdaad dat die man een groot probleem heeft en daar ben jij de dupe van. Jij werkt hard om wat bij te verdienen en hij smijt het over de balk. Zonde, ik kan me best voorstellen dat je ongelukkig bent.’ Ik knikte maar wat, wist ook niet wat ik zeggen moest. ‘Weet je,’ ging hij verder, ‘ik heb lang samengewoond met een vrouw die mij bedroog. Toen ik erachter kwam heb ik er zelf een punt achter gezet. Het was moeilijk en deed veel pijn, maar het was wel de juiste beslissing. Denk daar maar eens over na.’

Ik zei: ‘Ik weet het, dat doe ik ook heel vaak, maar het is best moeilijk. Ik zie er nu al tegenop om zometeen naar huis te gaan.’ Ik keek hem aan en zuchtte weer. ‘Maar goed, ik zal toch moeten.’ Ik stond op en lachte een beetje. ‘ Maar ik ga eerst opruimen.’

Hij stond ook op en pakte me vast: ‘Opruimen doe ik wel en je mag als je wilt hier blijven slapen. Dat is ook beter ook want je hebt gedronken.’ Even wist ik niet wat ik zeggen moest, maar heel even. We keken elkaar aan en ineens lag ik in zijn armen en zoende hij me.

Ja, ik ben blijven slapen en het was fantastisch. Jeetje wat een verschil met Wim. De volgende ochtend vroeg wisten we alle twee niet goed wat we zeggen moesten. Hij moest werken en ik naar huis.  Wim hoefde ik niks uit te  leggen omdat ik hem een berichtje gestuurd had met de mededeling dat mijn auto stuk was. Maar toch was het vreemd en raar toen ik hem zag. Een beetje dubbel.

Ik heb Ruud niet meer gesproken, maar morgen moet ik weer naar hem toe!!! Ben vreselijk benieuwd én… verliefd!

 

 

 

 

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292 antwoorden op “Maandag 20 Juli.”

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